December 30th 2016

I want my mom to be happy.

She’s 58 years old now, and I don’t want her to feel life has no more zest.

I am responsible for a lot of her regrets. I’m not the best daughter that I could be. It’s awful she sacrificed her sleep, health, and career to ensure I grew up the way I did.

I would’ve thought the older I grew, the more appreciative I’d become.

I’m scared of losing my mom one day, but I’m even more scared that I didn’t make her proud. Or that I didn’t do my duty as her daughter to make her dreams come true.

I know my mom would love to have her own Filipino restaurant. I know I’m only 17 and I can’t earn enough to pay a downpayment on a venue for her. I need to soon… I don’t want to run out of time.

I say I love her, but now I need to show her.

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